“I hate how hard spiritual transformation is and how long it takes. I hate thinking about how many people have gone to church for decades and remain joyless or judgmental or bitter or superior.” – John Ortberg, Pastor and Author
This past week, the New York Times ran a story about a little dust-up at a Manhattan yoga salon called Bode NYC. The cause: a yoga instructor had invited her class to temporarily refrain from drinking water. While this may sound unusual not to hydrate during a workout, the tradition of Bikram style yoga has a prescribed sequence of 26 yoga moves, guided by an instructor in a room heated to 105 degrees. Class members are encouraged to refrain from drinking until a half hour into the class, once they reach the eagle pose.
Veteran yoga instructor Irena (last name withheld) saw Roma Abdesselam take a drink before the eagle pose and reminded the class not to drink water until they were cued to do so. Frustrated, Roma, who is a social media influencer with 650,000 followers, left the studio and posted a video complaint on TikTok. Within a few days, the video garnered 2 million views, Irena lost that job, Bode NYC posted videos in support of hydration, and Roma said she never intended to get Irena fired. Online pundits and commentators indignantly fumed and raged in every direction: “People are so judgy… It was just an invitation, not an order… No one should bully others… Tell the instructor, not your fans… Traditions were made to be broken…” Yikes!
Everyone I know seems to dislike judgmental people. Nobody appreciates a scold or a nag. People tend to avoid fault-finders and critics. It’s just not much fun to be around them. As a preacher, I’m sensitive to what people are getting at when they say in conversation, “Don’t preach at me!”
But here’s a funny thing. You can’t accuse someone else of being judgmental without making some evaluative assessment upon their words or behaviors. In other words, you can’t call someone else judgmental without passing judgment upon them and their motives! You may be right, of course, but that ought to give us pause before we accuse others of being judgy. No one escapes evaluating the words and behaviors of others.
Here’s something else. I don’t know anyone who can improve in their discipline without accepting some constructive criticism. Athletes who won’t listen to their coaches will stagnate. Musicians who ignore their teachers will struggle to improve. Workers who are not coachable are not likely to advance in their jobs. Spouses who ignore each other’s requests invite further conflict. Proverbs 12:1 puts it bluntly: “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but those who hate to be rebuked are stupid.”
Finally, because we believe in a holy and just God, we also believe that divine judgment is in all humanity’s future, a day when all is put to rights. While it’s true that God’s fundamental disposition toward us is steadfast love, God’s love is not sentimental or indulgent. It is God’s will that we should live holy lives. As Christ’s followers, we believe that we are justified in Christ Jesus and saved by grace through faith. I pray that this reality will temper our harsh judgments of others and empower us to receive openly the constructive input of others.
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